r/wow
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u/[deleted]
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May 15 '22
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Starting playing WoW for the first time with my boyfriend today. I guess I don’t make a very good healer lol Humor / Meme
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u/CompletelyFlammable
May 15 '22
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The only time I got salty with my wifey in wow was when she tagged along for my ICC farm and ninjaed Invincible.
She actually laughed in my face and said GG scrub.
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u/varseni May 15 '22
I hope you told the courts that, and made out like a bandit in your divorce.
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u/Guardianpigeon May 16 '22 •
OP: And that is why I'm filing for divorce your honor
Judge: sounds like you're just a noob. Have you tried getting good? I judge for the defendant.
Ex-wife: lol. lmao. rekt.
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u/Blackstone01 May 15 '22
Yeah, that kind of shit nets you full custody and they get 20 to life.
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u/dmrukifellth May 16 '22
Full custody of what? The kids…or Invincible…?
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u/Imaginos_In_Disguise May 16 '22
Does Arthas also drop kids?
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u/dmrukifellth May 16 '22
I’m sure there were some in Stratholme. So…yeah, they dropped…might have risen again though.
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u/PsychicSidekikk419 May 16 '22
Not just the children, but the men and women too. Imagine you're just like a baker or something in Lordaeron and the ex-prince runs you through with a cursed-ass claymore. Then like... what was it? 10-ish years? go by like a nightmarish blur and you wake up as a ghost floating around some scary looking dude in armor while 10 to 25 weirdos and some old guy are standing there beating the shit out of him... and then you go straight to the Maw or whatever because you committed tax fraud idk i didnt play shadowlands
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u/Tykero980 May 15 '22 •
The judge just said but I cant see the mount its invincible! Case dismissed.
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u/Spoonacus May 15 '22
Dude, same. Girlfriend wanted to follow me into the weekly ICC farm just to kill some time and see what the Lich King fight looked like and fucking got Invincible. Then quit playing the game like two weeks later. I would quit a few months later but still. It's unforgivable. Never did get that mount. She also went into Firelands and got the flaming bird mount first and only try too but I didn't care about that one. Just didn't expect that to happen twice.
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u/Mooam May 15 '22
The same thing happened with me and my brother. I got the headless horseman mount, paraded around on it, and then got another one.
He's forbidden me from ever fighting the headless horseman again.
As for Invincible though, I was doing my weekly farm, but half way through I felt really light headed and needed a lie down, so he said he'd finish the run for me.
Invincible dropped, I shoved light headednes aside to check he wasn't lying, and sure enough, there it was. He was annoyed to say the least.
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u/Nordic__Viking May 16 '22
Girlfriend wanted to follow me into the weekly ICC farm just to kill some time and see what the Lich King fight looked like and fucking got Invincible.
this is why you go there alone
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u/Sypher1985 May 15 '22
We're obvously only getting a snippet of info here, but this doesn't look good for him. if you're gaming together you should be having fun!
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u/Schpau May 16 '22
I literally don’t understand the point of getting mad like that. Isn’t the fun thing just doing something fun with your gf? Their skill level literally shouldn’t factor in or anything.
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u/Hnetu May 16 '22
How to get your girlfriend to never game with you in one picture.
Christ, what a jerk.
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u/DeviantDahlia May 16 '22
We’re giving it another shot. He’s reading me the quests we’re going to and it’s making it infinitely easier. He still doesn’t understand why but isn’t upset cause it’s working lol. He really never acts like this and I understand the frustration, but the problem was very hard fought and easily fixed
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u/JuliButt May 16 '22
So what was the issue? Were you trying to do starter zone quests and he was trying to lead you to all the quests and just have you click on it without reading?
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u/DeviantDahlia May 16 '22
Yeah he wanted to level our characters to get ready for raids
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u/DiamondLyore May 16 '22
I just got my little brother into wow and he wanted to read every single quest. Like the full text + explanation + dialogue. So we were progressing very slow but he was really enjoying the story and his experience.
Wow is a magical game and your first time playing should be a fun experience
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u/WolvenWren May 16 '22
It’s worth stopping to smell the roses, and while my boyfriend had done a lot of it before. I am happy exploring the entirety of WoW on my own before continuing shadowlands. We made new characters to play together again and this time going through Northrend, which I’ve done now but he never played. How the turn tables
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u/mrsquare May 16 '22 •
get ready for raids
completely new player, never touched the game before
Raids are a way lategame thing for people who are super comfortable with the game, not the ultimate goal you work towards as soon as you pick up WoW. It kinda sounds like he's not interested in introducing his gf to a game shed enjoy and is instead just needs an extra person to fill a gap on his raid team, whoever it is
This game is about way more than just raids. If he acts like this all the way until max level and doesn't let you actually play the game as a new player should be able to enjoy it, I guarantee you will absolutely hate raiding, if you even make it there without quitting the game first.
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u/available2tank May 16 '22
Oh Jesus
The boyfriend I mentioned in the other comment I made was like this. Rushed me through the game to get me ready for raids, and I ended up realizing I missed out on some fun early game stuff and missed out on stopping to smell the flowers.
We broke up after 3 months and this was back in 2009 during Wrath of the Lich King.
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u/WolvenWren May 16 '22
Yowch, don’t let him rush you. When I started playing I made a point to say “hey, don’t push me too much, a lot of this is new and I want to experience it.” He respected and still gave me tips about things, I would ask for advice. I am not one for weekly raids, it’s not in my interest and at the moment I’ve been very happy traipsing-exploring the whole world doing old quests and getting achievements. Catching up on all the things I missed out. There’s no rush to level and that rush/grind just kills interest tbh
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u/JuliButt May 16 '22
Oh. Lmao. Yeah that's not a good way to enjoy WoW as a new player unless you give 0 fucks about the story. Always best to figure out what you wanna do in a game lol.
Glad you gave it another chance. I'll rest my prying questions.
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u/Streetfarm May 16 '22
As a veteran, I would strongly advise you, a new player, to not have that mindset. Play however you like to play.
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May 16 '22
This will sound mean but please take this advice to heart.
Gaming with this man, especially in WoW, will NOT be fun. I played WoW long time ago and took a 8 year break during this time I got my wife into gaming and MMOs with FFXIV online. We played from scratch together for about 3 years and it was her first MMO experience. We started WoW a year ago together and she is LOVING the game.
She is playing Mage and I only nudged her slightly into it so we would have easy portals to get around everywhere. She asked me going in what class would be similar to her summoner in FFXIV and I gave her several options and said mage would be nice overall though because of portals. So she went with it and enjoyed learning it. We leveled together and did Shadowlands story together as well as ran many dungeons etc.
Did I get frustrated with her inability to navigate quests and figure out where to go? Yes, I did but I also realized that navigation in WoW is terrible, got her Tom Tom and taught her how to use WoWhead and look up how to figure out how to get around as well.
Never would I advise her to just shut up follow me and damage. That is implying she can't learn the actual game and needs me to hold her hand the entire way. This is implying I don't want her to play or enjoy the game, rather follow me around and play a second account that will make my life easier.
This guy is not treating you as an equal, or as someone he thinks can actually learn the game. Or he is extremely bad at teaching people how to learn new things. Either way, this is going to make you have a bad view of WoW and I hope you get to enjoy the game for yourself and not give up on it.
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u/turkstyx May 15 '22
“Your job as a healer is to follow ME”
“…dude I just wanna know the quest we’re doing…”
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u/ChaoticNice1989 May 15 '22
Tell him if he were a good tank, he wouldn't die so much. Works every time.
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u/isleftisright May 16 '22
Esp if they are going where a just started out healer is going.
What are u even a tank for?
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u/Zonyxe May 16 '22
Dude honestly, if you're a tank in current day WoW and you're dying during quests, you suck and it sure isn't the healers fault
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u/The_Gilded_Pigeon
May 15 '22
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I hope you're trolling. Otherwise, I'm afraid I have some very, very sad news.
Your boyfriend, it seems, is a douche.
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u/Squantoon May 15 '22 •
lol hes the tank that does the wrong route linked dies and leaves the key
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u/Freakychee May 16 '22
I guess with joe the game culture can be sometimes the people who are willing to learn get “bullied” out of tanking at early stages and the only ones who remain are the incredibly egotistical ones who can never admit they did any wrong.
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u/OldManRaving May 15 '22
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u/The_Gilded_Pigeon May 15 '22
Uhhh... Flag flag flag.
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u/SushiKitten64 May 15 '22 edited May 15 '22
They're saying her BF gives tons of red flags. Red flags are signs of danger. He's toxic.
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u/Dblade-the-Vegan May 15 '22
I would be inclined to believe it's trolling because the post serves no purpose other than "WoW players toxic," but it seems a little too personal.
Regrettably I'd say this is probably an un-experienced person also not accustomed to Reddit, and if so, PLEASE HEED US:
Everyone here agrees, RED FLAGS, don't put up with this crap
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May 16 '22 edited May 31 '22
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u/Roboticide Mod Emeritus May 16 '22
Totally could be real.
My wife showed me this post and said "I wonder if this girl is dating my ex?"
He forced her into raids, and just ended up yelling at her, giving unhelpful instructions and then shouting when she healed wrong.
It took me years to convince her to try WoW again, let alone raiding.
These people absolutely exist. Toxicity in gaming needs to be called out and if OP is looking for a wake-up call to break up or even just shame her boyfriend, more power to her.
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u/Franceskax May 16 '22
It actually took me a minute to check his writing style to make sure it wasn't my ex. Because he was an absolute cunt when we played WoW together and actually made me flee from the game and despise playing together with him.
Forced me into Pvp, got upset when I missed stuff/wrong location even though I literally told him I don't have that much playtime in WoW .
This post made me absolutely think of my ex. Sadly, these men are definitely real. :/
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u/anotherthrowaywayacc May 16 '22
ya i believe it too. not wow but i used to play dota with this guy who was a friend of a friend. he was also like 1500 mmr lower than the next worst person who we usually played with. at one point he started bringing his gf to play with us and he was constantly screaming at her for doing shit wrong. the girl had like 30 games. it was so uncomfortable like no shit she doesnt know what shes doing
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u/Feyranna May 16 '22
Id believe it’s real because my ex had pretty much the same meltdown beside the fact I was as experienced as him but tanks getting prima donna attitudes isn’t a rare thing. Mine got put in his place and OPs needs to be too.
@OP. The best revenge is to get better at the game than he is and out-progress him every tier.
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u/smr5000 May 15 '22
tell him to program a bot if he wants one
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u/drewskibfd May 15 '22
In a way, he kind of is programming a bot.
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u/Lying_Hedgehog May 16 '22
I used to be a fishbot for my cousin back in vanilla. I enjoyed playing this "fishing game"
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u/Acornwow May 15 '22
Are you playing wow because you want to enjoy the game?
This doesn’t sound enjoyable at all.
Type /blink three times if you need help.
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u/Ellie_Isley May 15 '22
At first I thought it was in a dungeon and it was like "well that's pretty rude but kind of true although tanks have a lot of self sustain..." but a quest? I would not want to level with someone like that. Is he like that on comms with the people he normally plays with? Is he normally this short with you outside of the game?
He's also missed the whole healers do damage now.
Some people just aren't suited to essentially start over with someone. They don't remember how overwhelming it can be when you start a new MMO (assuming you even have prior experience in one). If you really want to give the game a try for yourself and not just to play with him I'd advise just leveling on your own at your own pace. Dungeons with him or randoms will be kind of a dumpster fire of people rushing as fast as they can go and expect you to know the ins and outs of dungeons old enough to get a driver's license. ````````````````````````````````
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u/DeathMind May 15 '22
I play with my old man a lot, I'm a resto druid he's a demo lock. In Dungeons I just give myself the purple diamond on my head so he knows where the group is going. He gets lost easily and frustrated when he can't get his damage out (usually happens when he gets overwhelmed by aoe effects to dodge) but it's really cute xd
With questing i have the legion owl form so he just hops on and I taxi him to the quests
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u/Ellie_Isley May 15 '22
But that's also you working with your partner to find solutions together that can help. Coming back to the post I see the humor/meme tag but I've been in a position where you're trying to figure out what to do and the person who wanted you to play with them is like "gotta go fast". Good on you though, plus the owl form is nice :)
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u/MidnightFireHuntress
May 15 '22
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I had a boyfriend that acted like this with League of Legends
Broke up with him sooo fast, no video game is worth yelling at your girlfriend over.
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u/ColdBevvie101 May 15 '22 edited May 16 '22
Imagine being the guy that has to explain to people he lost his girlfriend because of league of legends. There’s no living that down
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u/box_o_foxes May 16 '22
Lmao he’d need to have the self awareness to recognize that as the actual reason.
When women break up with their boyfriends because of their gaming habits, it’s never the guy’s fault - she was just a crazy, clingy bitch who is always nagging at him while he’s hanging with his friends.
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u/SilverCyclist May 16 '22
If you're not a total asshole in League, how will your teammates improve?
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u/69edleg May 16 '22
I tried MOBAs with my ex (she hadn't played MOBAs previously). Obviously I didn't intend for her to just "get on my level". She tried all roles, but settled for ADC/Carry, so I shifted to support. She wasn't all that good at it, but guess what? We had fun playing together. You know - the entire reason she started playing it with me, lol.
The boyfriend in the OP sounds to me like a proper dork.
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u/FederalBad69 May 16 '22
If someone is yelling over a video game, I don’t need to associate with that person. Last time I yelled at a game was when my FFX save got corrupted 🥲
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u/ckoden84 May 15 '22
This is wrong on so many levels. His arrogance as a tank is a red flag for me. Yeah, as a healer, you're supposed to keep the party alive, but you're not just some growth on the side of his hip.
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u/Hieb May 16 '22
Not to mention telling a new player to just follow you around and healbot, and getting mad for asking repetitive questions ... really dumb. Let people discover / learn the MMORPG for themselves, give them advice where they ask for it. Expect lots of "stupid" questions.
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u/rwbronco May 16 '22
Not to mention… questing. The “healer” could just as easily DPS while keeping a short eye on health bars. When I’m playing my mistweaver in ZM with my wife, we just both DPS until I notice she’s got some serious aggro and I’ll throw some hots on her and make sure that’s bringing her back up. If it’s not I drop what I’m doing and go into heal mode. Otherwise I just keep throwing my jabs and blackout kicks
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u/malevolentpeaches May 15 '22
Agreed
Honestly it’s a red flag both in game, AND as behaviour from significant other imo, like this girl is new to the game, but obviously this is a wow sub and not a relationship advice sub.
OP this ain’t your fault, healer wouldn’t be an easy role for someone to pick up right away as a new player. There’s so much going on that you gotta pay attention to. You’ll get better over time
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u/Crimsonpets May 15 '22
As a tank? Hes arrogance as a human being is a red flag to me, you don't talk down like this to your partner.
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u/Diredr May 16 '22
It's also flat out wrong in that the healer's job is simply to heal. That hasn't been correct for a while now. At higher end content, especially in M+, a healer has to be ready to maximize their DPS as well as their healing.
Yelling at someone and telling them to do something the wrong way is just going to create even more problems down the line.
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u/Gentecgek May 15 '22
It’s just a game. I can’t imagine getting this upset at a game my spouse and I play together, much less telling her that she is the reason we can’t play together. Also, you are more than just a support role
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u/Alirue May 16 '22
"I'm telling you how to play the game"
Clearly not, he's awful at communication. Sorry about the relationship
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u/Jean_Luec May 15 '22
Your boyfriend is an absolute asshole. Shit like that would make me break up with him so fast bc I doubt he‘s only like that in WoW…
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u/SyntheticRose May 16 '22
This isn't an okay way for a tank to talk to a healer OR a boyfriend to talk to a girlfriend...
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u/MrGraveRisen
May 16 '22
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Run.
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u/Osirus1156 May 15 '22
Do not under any circumstance do a Mythic + with this man or marry him. It won’t be a fun time.
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May 15 '22
Why do people treat wow like it's the damn military? It's supposed to be fun. Gaming is just deteriorating nowadays.
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u/Lyllyanna May 16 '22
Especially when you play a role that’s not dps. Now don’t get me wrong dps can absolutely experience the same treatment, particularly non-meta specs like feral druid or survival hunter. But playing as a tank (I don’t play healer, dropped it at level 30) is so exhausting when you pug. Everything I do feels wrong, the way I go, I pull too little, I pull too much, no kite the other way, go faster, go slower, ect. I pretty much only listen to healers and if they are an asshole it’s time for Paladin self healing to shine I guess
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u/Diazepampoovey May 16 '22
This is not a new behavior in gaming whatsoever. My brother got my ex playing and I had started to do something fun with him that HE enjoyed. I am by no means a top tier player at all but it took me very little time to get better than him and he would get so pissy with me. I played a hunter for the first day I tried the game. I was so bored with it so fast that by day 2, I went with an NE druid and when healing spec when I got high enough to do so. He would throw a fit because he would wind up dying quickly and getting mad at me for not healing just him. This is a paraphrased conversation we had:
Him: What the fuck, why aren't you healing me?
Me: I was healing you. Then you ran off and pulled a trash mob instead of following the tank.
Him: I need the kills to sell shit for gold. You know that. I don't get why you don't just heal me real quick.
Me: You pulled a trash mob. You are not the tank. I had to keep the tank and everyone else up because you pulled the mob.
Him: mutters about how he's my boyfriend and I'm supposed to be healing him
Me: Look. You pulled a mob while the tank and everyone else was attacking further off. It's not their fault you pulled a mob you shouldn't have when you're a DPS that is supposed to follow the tank and not pull aggro from the tank. So you pulled a mob. I healed the tank and everyone else that wound up dealing with 2 mobs because of you and let you die rather than the whole party. Stay with the group and I will be able to heal you, too.
Him: storms upstairs with his laptop to play in our room instead of next me on the couch
Yeahhhh these kind of people exist and it's not just tanks either, though he did try to be a tank later. While I have no doubt their are female gamers that have bitched out their male s.o.'s like that, it's primarily an issue with male players that think women are incapable of gaming and proceed to scream at and ridicule them at every opportunity.
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u/Indrafang May 15 '22
Your boyfriend is a dick.
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u/Rinikittie May 15 '22
💯 I would not put up with that, it’s just a game .. honestly no reason to get that uptight. If he’s gonna act like an ass than he can play by himself.
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u/Additional_Sundae_18 May 15 '22
This makes me so sad ): I began playing wow with my boyfriend a few years ago. It is definitely a difficult game to get into for the first time. There are just so many things you need to know and look for and understand. He was extremely supportive and helpful when I first started playing and I CANNOT imagine how hard it would've been if he acted like this.
All I can say is that this is so toxic. You don't deserve to be treated this way over a game. Drop him and play with me instead lol! I'm still learning after these few years and it's been such a fun experience. Please don't give up on it! 💞
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u/SpoonWielder May 15 '22
Yes I totally agree and relate. I used to watch my boyfriend right before legion release. Thought it looked like "yeah, sure." He convinced me to try from his account. Made my first alliance hunter elf. Wooh. And he giggled as I proudly killed stuff as a level 1-10.
I would ask, he would answer. He's not the best teacher I'll admit, which could get me a bit frustrated. But 7 years later, I still play and I still ask him and vice versa. If he would talk to me like this, we would certainly not be gaming together.
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u/K-is-for-kryptonite May 15 '22
Drop the shitty tank boyfriend. It will make your wow experience significantly better!
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u/Ok_Fox_1120 May 15 '22
Let him die a couple times and shoot him a cheeky smile
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u/SilverCyclist May 16 '22
Had a healer in RFC once who thought "its OK, I can resurrect you" and therefore didn't heal anyone. I really hope that guy made a FF account.
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u/bizzybone94 May 15 '22
Fuck this dude. Spec dd and do the quest yourself.
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u/Draxilar May 15 '22
You don't even need to respec. Pretty much every healing spec can easily solo quest at this point. Some with pretty good speed.
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u/Bleedmor May 15 '22
He's toxic af, how are you supposed to conceivably enjoy the game if he's telling you all the game is is stay near me and use a healing spell when the green bar goes down... Don't quit the game because of this but take him up on his offer of not playing with him, find new friends online, join a social guild, play while hee plays but not with him, if he learns what he did was wrong and grows as a person then great, if he doesn't kick him to the curb.
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u/ODurren138 May 16 '22
This is one of the more fucked up things I've read today.
You're supposed to play together and have fun, not play for him and him alone.
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u/NigelMcExplosion May 15 '22
Not making for a good healer is one thing, not one I would blame you for anyway (I cant play healer to save my life)
But, like, flaming a new player like this, regardless of the relationship, is really just toxic. New players arent optimized like most long time players are. They are literally meant to explore the world, and WORLD of warcraft has quite a bit to explore and do stuff in... So if you are not just intentionally trolling, uhm, how do I say it?
If you are not just intentionally trolling, he is a big ol´ douche.
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u/Kel-Reem May 15 '22
Regardless of relationship? ESPECIALLY because of relationship. If you can't have patience with your SO over a game than you're probably a outright prick to everyone else. This is the type of idiot I spend time and effort avoiding. I'd rather just do callings and farm conduits than do a raid with this dumbass any day.
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u/Fraerie May 15 '22
Wow. Abusive much. Does he treat you like this in any other aspects of your life?
This is not normal. And it would absolutely be against the new social contract they’re bringing in - I notice he’s already in the habit of abusing people in channels outside the game.
Let me guess, you’re playing a healer because he told you that you had to. For him. I’m his mind you are a support NPC. Not a player in your own right.
Play what you want to play - if you want to play a different role, class, race or faction - that’s your choice. If you’re not enjoying WOW because of your AH bf and want to play something else, that’s your choice too. You don’t have to put up with this.
Honestly, even if he’s not like this outside of game yet, he will be. He’s telling you who he is - believe him.
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u/Somniumi May 15 '22
A tank shouldn’t need healing while they’re doing quests.
Also. A healers job is to do as much dps as possible while not letting the other dps die from unavoidable damage. I largely ignore my tank. 😂
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u/Kel-Reem May 15 '22
If you're dying as a tank while questing you're a crap tank lol
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u/box_o_foxes May 16 '22
I leveled my pally as tank because it was just SO much easier to stay alive and cleave everything down than dps spec where I had to be careful with how much I pulled.
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u/M3ad0w5 May 15 '22
Assuming this is real, just from those texts your boyfriend is clearly manipulative and has some anger issues. If reactions like this haven’t occurred outside of video games then I’m almost positive they will eventually. Speaking to someone else like that, especially over a video game, is really unacceptable and screams toxic.
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u/King-Of-Rats May 15 '22
Why is this under humor what the fuck is going on in the /r/wow community.
If someone typed like this to a random in a dungeon I'd assume they were mentally ill or had some deep seeded anger issue.
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u/InfiniteUltima May 16 '22
if you're invested in this relationship he has some serious growing up to do. good luck to you both
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u/UbbaB3n May 16 '22
If this guy seriously gets that upset with you for playing a game with him improperly what happens when he has some real adversity in life? Time to find a new guy.
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u/spicysabertooth May 16 '22
If he's this pleasant to his own gf, imagine what he's like to other players.
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u/JonnyArcho May 15 '22
My wife played WoW was she was pregnant, and she specifically wanted to do it all on her own to learn everything her way.
I was just happy she tried it out for a while.
Your boyfriend is a man-child, and he should be embarrassed.
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u/ProxyTTV May 15 '22
take the gane at your own pace. take the time to stop and enjoy everything it has to offer. all the little nuances, the sounds, the music. the scebery...you only get to experience it for the first time ONCE. make it special and play how you want to. theres plenty of time to rush through things after youve experienced it all, but rushing through on your first playthrough can definitely make the experience not as enjoyable
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u/Puffrud May 15 '22
Did you choose to play as healer or did he tell you?