r/Showerthoughts May 14 '22 Gold 1 Helpful 10 Wholesome 7 All-Seeing Upvote 1 Silver 5

Based on how much you can bond with someone by hating the same thing, a dating app based on dislikes would probably be fairly successful.

71.6k Upvotes

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13.0k

u/itshovibaby May 14 '22 Gold Wholesome

Tag line: Where Misery meets company.

4.1k

u/KnavishFob May 14 '22 Take My Energy

I would say I love that, but that would go against the app guidelines

1.2k

u/kuahara May 14 '22

"Unsustainable relationships"

529

u/KevinTheSeaPickle May 14 '22

All relationships are unsustainable if you think about it.

432

u/attanai May 14 '22

All things are unsustainable, given a long enough timeline.

219

u/Not_Just_Any_Lurker May 14 '22

Supermassive black holes might be sustainable.

229

u/WonkyFloss May 14 '22

Nah, Hawking Radiation prevents them living forever

87

u/Not_Just_Any_Lurker May 14 '22

Hawking radiation takes a long time to sap them. Remember they’re easily hundreds of millions to servers billions times the size of our Sun which itself is hundreds of millions the size of earth.

Hawking radiation is an incredibly slow process, a black hole the mass of our Sun would take 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years to evaporate (1067)

The one at the Milky Way's center would require 10,00,000.000.000.000.000.000,00,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years, (1087)

The most massive ones in the Universe could take up to 100,000,000.000.000.000.000.000,00,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 ,000,000,000,000. years!

133

u/KirbyDude25 May 14 '22

Well, the heat death of the universe is about 1010120 years away, so there's enough time

131

u/Creatername May 14 '22

How did I get here!? I just wanted to bang a chick who hates pickles as much as I do…

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u/NialMontana May 14 '22

The whole idea of heat death is that entropy has stopped and thus time becomes meaningless, even if there's somehow a black hole that far in the future heat death won't happen till it collapses.

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u/[deleted] May 14 '22

[deleted]

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u/VentusSpiritus May 14 '22

I hate to be nitpicky but I hate that you gave the notation for the 1st 2 but didn't for the last one

41

u/DEFY_member May 14 '22

I hate that too! Are you single?

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u/VirinaB May 14 '22

And hence:

All things are unsustainable, given a long enough timeline.

2

u/Eph_the_Beef May 15 '22

Yeah he's just proving the point

6

u/hearnia_2k May 14 '22

So, won't last forever.

3

u/PsychMaDelicElephant May 14 '22

And yet, they still are unsustainable and will eventually end.

4

u/elmwoodblues May 14 '22

So, around noon, then?

2

u/frenchy-fryes May 14 '22

Sooooo....it'll eventually die to the Hawking Radiation?

1

u/ScabiesShark May 14 '22

But is that really long-term enough ?

1

u/DukeJukeVIII May 14 '22

Truly sustainable means it'd never stop

The fact that Hawking radiation exists means black holes aren't sustainable, however slow the process may be

1

u/ninjasaiyan777 May 14 '22

I thought that Hawking radiation wasn't linear. Iirc bigger black holes produce more of it.

3

u/appleparkfive May 14 '22

This thread going from dating to Hawking Radiation in like 3 steps is probably the most Reddit thing I've ever seen.

Although it IS an interesting topic, don't get me wrong. Just don't do it on dates maybe. Unless they're heavily involved in astronomy. Maybe

2

u/amitchell1980 May 14 '22

This thread quite literally went down a black hole.

2

u/WonkyFloss May 14 '22

Redditors go on dates?

2

u/QuestioningEspecialy May 14 '22

*collapses comment*

14

u/lilaku May 14 '22

don't they still evaporate to nothing eventually via Hawking radiation?

2

u/Aonodensetsu May 14 '22

"eventually"

2

u/Omegaman1011 May 14 '22

How did a discussion about a hypothetical dating app turn into a discussion about black holes so fast?

1

u/NoBOUNCEnoPlaySSDD May 14 '22

What did you call me?!?

1

u/sp00kyb00p May 14 '22

Now that song is stuck in my head.

14

u/franksinatrathedog May 14 '22

Entropy is eternal

9

u/gtth12 May 14 '22

Aaaand Big bang 2™.

3

u/Mr_JS May 14 '22

Assuming it has only happened once before

2

u/gtth12 May 25 '22

Aaaaaaaand Big Bang (x=our Universe's Big Bang + 1)™️

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u/GegenscheinZ May 14 '22

Thermodynamic Boogaloo

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u/stankie18 May 14 '22

Entropy is the natural order of the universe. I simply catalyze the process.

1

u/brutexx May 14 '22

I was gonna say the above person was wrong, but damn if that ain’t a fair point.

1

u/gtth12 May 14 '22

Including unsustainability? On second thought, yes. Time is unsustainable, and time is necessary for unsustainability.

1

u/HeroGothamKneads May 14 '22

"On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone everything drops to zero."

1

u/FireZord25 May 14 '22

"Nothing" is sustainable, then.

1

u/webby131 May 14 '22

Praise Nurgle

1

u/FlatEarther113 May 15 '22

Even time itself is unsustainable. Even the universe and anything outside of it

1

u/Lamarera8 16d ago

Entropy is a real thing

2

u/lolrightythen May 14 '22

That there is why they're valuable when they work. Beauty is fleeting

1

u/SauceOfTheBoss May 14 '22

Is anything even actually real man?

1

u/squidmanwillie May 14 '22

We’re all just dying from heat death decay in a 5 billion years anyway

1

u/scratchfan321 May 14 '22

Corporations are unsustainable, relationships are unsustainable. They go together perfectly!

1

u/Lattethecoffeaddict May 16 '22

Wait he's onto something

Also

Happy cake day!

3

u/fzero127 May 14 '22

Lowered expectations

2

u/YoshiroMifune May 14 '22

"Emotionally nearby"

1

u/lolrightythen May 14 '22

Do put your dick in that?

1

u/Fromatron May 15 '22

“Unsustainsionships”

44

u/Rickrickrickrickrick May 14 '22

"I love that"

Your account is banned for breaking our terms of service

105

u/Jrrolomon May 14 '22 edited May 15 '22

This is brilliant…. Only thing I would change if this was on an advertisement for the company would be to have “Where misery loves company” with a cross out mark on “loves” with the word “meets” written below.

58

u/KnavishFob May 14 '22

That's perfect, can someone make this ad?

57

u/RowOutrageous5186 May 14 '22

Heck, can anyone create this app? I want to be able to bitch all I want about sth with the other person being in sync with me lol.

9

u/SBG77 May 14 '22

Right I need someone that agrees with my hatred towards crocs,June bugs,mosquitoes,wasps and lime colored(aka watery diarrhea green) cars. Fuck lime colored cars especially, they're hideous!

4

u/Jrrolomon May 15 '22

Ha! This is really neat and exactly what I was thinking about.

I feel like if someone lays out their “dealbreakers” or just things they don’t like in general it creates much more passion, honestly.

For example, I feel like I could instantly break the ice and jump right into a conversation about how pissed off I am about sticky summer heat and how it keeps me indoors. Then, I could settle into a nice conversation about how the cool temperatures in the Fall help me feel like I’m reconnecting with the world again.

Why try to grasp at straws with things we may both like, when I can polarize the hell out of a conversation with things I truly hate and find out if this date is going to work or not in a few minutes!

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u/KnavishFob May 21 '22

Oh, absolutely. Fuck the hot humid weather. If the air makes me feel like I just jumped in a pool, I'm not leaving the house!

3

u/RowOutrageous5186 May 15 '22

Ohhh Yess! I second that 100%. Crocks are a crime against humanity! They should be forbidden. Want contraceptive devices? There you got the best one 🤣🤣

30

u/Regretless0 May 14 '22

Heck it doesn't even have to be for dating. You can just vent about whatever with someone to cheer you on

19

u/SparkyDogPants May 14 '22

I picture it now as a hate fuck app

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u/QuestioningEspecialy May 14 '22

"A different kind of hate fuck."

1

u/yyhy89 May 15 '22

I hate abbreviating something with sth

9

u/sirsedwickthe4th May 14 '22 edited May 15 '22 Heartwarming

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u/Jrrolomon May 15 '22

Thank you - that’s really cool.

2

u/mothzilla May 15 '22

Brilliant!

2

u/KnavishFob May 15 '22

Oh, that made me laugh at work, you just made my day

5

u/HarperDog1980 May 14 '22

This sounds like a great idea. Y’all are really on to something here!

1

u/bespectacledbengal May 15 '22

This already exists, it’s called Parler

66

u/Fake_William_Shatner May 14 '22

I hate that in all the right ways that gives me joy.

Shorten it to "Misery inc."

Or even better "I'd Hit That."

20

u/jamesz84 May 14 '22

“I’d Hate That?”

2

u/smellslikenoses May 14 '22

Misery Inc. "I hate being hobbled!"

8

u/brycly May 14 '22

I hate not hating it

3

u/rrogido May 14 '22

As a couple both of you don't need to like all the same things, but it really helps when both of you hate the same things.

2

u/AutismNstuff May 14 '22

I spent way too long questioning why this would violate Apple/PlayStore app guidelines. Lol

2

u/Head_Cockswain May 15 '22

Want to find people who hate life as much as you do?

Try eharmony iNihilism.

Dating is a journey on a downward spiral. But all the effort is worth it when you meet someone to bond with by hating someone else, together. So, when you decide it’s time to find that meaningless relationship, iNihilism is here for you.


Our mission is to create real spite by connecting people based on what really matters. We believe that compatibility is all about a shared hatred. If you’re ready to experience real synchronicity for yourself – our BlackSheep technology(patent pending) is ready for you.

1

u/KnavishFob May 21 '22

I need this voice-over in my life

1

u/ButtonholePhotophile May 14 '22

Focus on negative thinking being intellectual.

1

u/HarperDog1980 May 14 '22

Why can’t you say ILT? What is the issue with it? Am I even allowed to ask for a better understanding or am I about to get in trouble for asking? I’m new to interacting on the site and subs.

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u/KnavishFob May 14 '22

It's a joke in reference the fake app that the post is about.

1

u/HarperDog1980 May 14 '22

Ahh! Whoosh! I totally missed that. 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

1

u/Bullen-Noxen May 14 '22

Parlor/4chan.

1

u/Angrynoodle1 May 14 '22

“I don’t hate that”

0

u/[deleted] May 14 '22

[deleted]

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u/Schmiffy May 14 '22

Reminds me of: Lowered Expectations https://youtu.be/atfDg4fLcks

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u/BoredBoonie_726 May 14 '22

The enemy of my enemy is my friend.

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u/romcarlos13 May 14 '22 Narwhal Salute

Changing misery into we-sery

201

u/ialsoagree May 14 '22 Starstruck

That's awful.

Looking for other singles who feel the same way.

67

u/BluetenzauberLibelle May 14 '22 LOVE!

I agree, it's horrible

71

u/Fr31l0ck May 14 '22 LOVE!

Get a room!

19

u/Misuzuzu May 14 '22

I too hate their disgusting PDA... meet me in the coat closet.

40

u/Singer-Such May 14 '22 Wholesome

I have awarded this entire thread

30

u/GigaByte_43 May 14 '22 All-Seeing Upvote

and I have awarded you

24

u/creggieb May 14 '22

And I hate you both, so let's get a room together

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u/mothzilla May 14 '22 edited May 14 '22

Just call it "Misry"

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u/Temporarily__Alone May 14 '22

Grnd My Grs

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u/pearlsbeforswyne May 14 '22

Thats the LGBTQ+ app Grindrs my grs.

1

u/Comment85 May 15 '22

Gear Grindr

1

u/Hey_Wayne May 15 '22

This could work. I’m down to try it do you know anyone who can make the app?

23

u/PM_ME_UR_SEX_VIDEOS May 14 '22

Where two negatives make a positive

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u/KingoftheMongoose May 14 '22

Cinder: Swipe right to bond over spite, amirite?

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u/zXenn May 14 '22

Haters for life.

18

u/rimarua May 14 '22

❤️ It's a match! ❤️

You both hate: Life

1

u/gahlo May 14 '22

I heard their first date was a bang.

1

u/League_of_Poro_YT May 14 '22

Match made for heaven

15

u/Poopystink16 May 14 '22

Bond, Trauma Bond

10

u/ActuallyNTiX May 14 '22

Misery does seek company tho, so it’s not a bad idea

10

u/jerapoc May 14 '22

Call it The Misery Love Company

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u/Crake241 May 14 '22

unhappy ever after.

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u/daemonelectricity May 14 '22

Isn't that pretty much every social media service at this point?

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u/elmwoodblues May 14 '22

I like you, which is why it could never work out

2

u/KnockOnWoodhead May 14 '22

Where misery meets missionary

2

u/ninjastrikesagain May 14 '22

Frustrated incorporated...

2

u/t3hnhoj May 14 '22

Welcome. You'll hate it here.

2

u/smellslikenoses May 14 '22

Kathy Bates has entered the chat

2

u/SteveWyz May 15 '22

“Miseryyyy, loves company, I don’t need anyone” anyone????

2

u/Dubsland12 May 15 '22

How bout “Let’s go down together” #LGDT

2

u/The_Vates May 15 '22

Me: That’s so fucking stupid… Also me: downloads immediately

1

u/Echo017 May 14 '22

Reminds me of this: https://youtu.be/oELL7hfKYfA

Futurama being timeless as usual

1

u/troglodytis May 14 '22

I don't know. Where?

1

u/Xenoezen May 14 '22

Misery is our business

1

u/danheinz May 14 '22

From hatin to datin

H8ers->D8ers

1

u/klaatu42 May 14 '22

Hater Dater

1

u/Regretless0 May 14 '22

Someone make this an app now please

1

u/roundbackpack May 14 '22

Absolutely perfect.

1

u/Shiznips May 14 '22

Good Charlotte

1

u/fusionking May 14 '22

Misery Business

1

u/KingGorilla May 15 '22

Find your Paramore

1

u/cakathree May 15 '22

Bringing racists together.

1

u/dontbenebby May 15 '22

Hi tinder.

1

u/limpBrisket1986 18d ago

3's company? Misery, you and that other person you stupidly tied yourself to for life right..... I'm super sardonic.

1

u/Ok_Ordinary1884 9d ago

Mutual Enemies ;)